NOW.

This is an homage to all you faithful blog readers out there: You seriously need to get laid. Seriously.

I mean, I pour my thoughts and my life's little joys and sorrows and all my crap in here and you regularly read all my crap.

Seriously. Don't you have your own crap to worry about? I have enough crap. Enough to post every day.

You see, people that get laid don't really worry about other people's crap. Their only concern is how to get laid again. In a certain amount that is healthy. I would even call it necessary.

I have news for you: people that post regularly are frustrated people. They discharge their frustration by writing down all their crap. Again: in a certain amount, that is healthy.
Some even try to get laid through their posts, trying to get attention. It is kind of sad, yes.
I noticed that once you get laid your posts will become more and more scarce. The better the sex, the rarer the posts.

However, people that regularly read blogs are in a separate class on their own: they worry about getting laid. Yes, they do too. But before they go out there to get laid they stop at the computer. They check their e-mails. And then they decide to read the bookmarked blogs to see what's new.
You see, once you start reading a blog you will indubitably [I just had to use that word] end up reading more and more. And that ends up taking more and more time and the getting laid plans are postponed for an unmeasured period of time. You people occupy your time by bathing in other people's frustrations.
Yes, that is Way more sad.


Now if you actually got here, at this line, close to the ending of this post, you are in desperate need to get laid. You are a sad, sad person. You seriously need to get laid.
Go.
Now.
Get laid.

Seriously!